Traumatic Brain Injury, Fatigue, Anxiety, Anguish and Depression Part 3

Please read Part 1 and Part 2 for context. Thank you.

I discovered that I could stop persecuting myself because of my susceptibility to becoming fatigued I discovered that I could take steps to address my anxiety and anguish. I discovered that I could embrace the reality that I am susceptible to becoming fatigued — by practicing healthy self-care. I discovered that I could take positive steps to address my anxiety and my anguish. I discovered that I could take the time to address my fatigue. I discovered that I could take care of first things first.

I discovered that I could incorporate empowering strategies to help me when I become fatigued. Among the strategies that I found that I could use when I become mentally, emotionally, spiritually and spiritually fatigued is the principle of H.A.L.T.S..

Through my process I discovered that specific factors contributed to and exacerbated my susceptibility to becoming fatigued. I discovered that when I am hungry, angry, lonely, tired or sick I tend to be more susceptible to becoming fatigued. In my awareness, I discovered that when I am hungry, angry, lonely, tired or sick I needed to take the time to address of those needs. In my experience I have that once I take care of my hunger, anger, lonely, tired or sick needs that my fatigue subsides.

By taking the time to address my hungry, angry, lonely, tired and if I am sick needs I have been able to embrace, accept and address my fatigue. In the process I am able to alleviate my anxiety, anguish and depression. In the process my fatigue subsides and I gain a fresh perspective. With my renewed perspective I am able to embrace myself as a traumatic brain survivor who experiences fatigue. In the process I am able to stop fighting against myself.

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Traumatic Brain Injury, Fatigue, Anxiety, Anguish and Depression Part 2

Please read Part 1 and Part 3 for context. Thank you.

Consequently, I turned my fatigue, anxiety and anguish inward because I was told that if I just tried harder I could overcome the effects of my traumatic brain injury. I turned fatigue, anxiety and anguish inward as anger toward myself — which perpetuated my anxiety and anguish. Because I turned my anguish inward I found that I sabotaged myself. I undermined my ability to accept myself as a traumatic brain injury survivor.

I continued to berate myself for the fatigue, anxiety and anguish that I experienced until I had a shift in my awareness. Through my recovery process — as a traumatic brain injury survivor — I discovered that traumatic brain injury survivors are more susceptible to becoming fatigued. With my awareness I discovered that I could stop buying into a denial system that — overtly and covertly — berated me for being affected by a traumatic brain injury.

With my awareness I discovered that I could stop fighting against myself.

With my awareness, I realized that I could start living my life in a different way. I realized that I could look for strategies that would actively empower my process as a traumatic brain injury survivor — who experiences fatigue. With my awareness I discovered that I could stop being driven to be more — to prove that my life and my relationships were not impacted by my being a traumatic brain injury survivor. I discovered that I could stop judging my efforts. I discovered that I could start celebrating my process.

I discovered that I could stop berating myself. I discovered that I could stop sabotaging myself. I discovered that I could start being kind to myself. I discovered that I could start embracing myself — as a unique individual who experienced a traumatic brain injury. I discovered that I could begin practicing healthy self-care — without guilt. I discovered that I could become my own advocate. I discovered that I could stay in the moment. I discovered that I could take steps to practice first things first.

I discovered that I could become my own champion. I discovered that I could stay in the moment. I discovered that I could take steps to practice first things first.

Please read Part 3 for context. Thank you.

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Traumatic Brain Injury, Fatigue, Anxiety, Anguish and Depression Part 1

Hello and welcome back to Second Chance to Live. I am happy to see that you decided to stop by to visit with me. Several days ago I received a request to address a topic. I will do so in this article. Anguish brought on by mental and physical fatigue. Thank you for the request.

In life, perspective plays a big role in how I experience circumstances and events. For many years I viewed circumstances and events as punitive or consequences for not being enough. My perspective skewed my ability to be at peace — with God, other people and myself. In my attempt to overcompensate for believing that I was not enough I strove all the more to prove that I was enough. My perspective perpetuated an ongoing state of anxiety which resulted in my experiencing anguish.

Anguish — as defined by Merriam-Webster — is to inflict with distress, suffering and pain. I experienced distress, suffering and pain through absorbing criticism for not being enough — from other people as well as from my internal critic. In the process I experienced ongoing anxiety.

Through my recovery work as a traumatic brain injury survivor I discovered that mental, emotional and physical fatigue are common characteristics of traumatic brain injury. I also discovered that as a person experiences ongoing mental, emotional and physical fatigue their sense of worth and value erodes over time. Because I did not know how my life and my world had been impacted by my traumatic brain injury — for many years — I turned my fatigue and anxiety inward which resulted in my experiencing anguish.

Through my recovery work I discovered a sad reality. For many years I had turned my fatigue, anxiety and anguish inward as anger toward myself. As I turned my anger inward I experienced depression — anger turned inward brings about depression. My depression reinforced my anguish which reinforced my perspective of not being enough.

Fatigue — feeling of being less than — bringing about anxiety — producing anguish — leading to anger turned inwards — resulting in depression — reinforcing fatigue, anxiety, depression and anger — perpetuating my perspective of not being enough.

Please read Part 2 and Part 3 for context. Thank you.

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Do you feel like a victim?

Do you feel like a victim? Do you feel victimized by life? I would like to be of service to both you and to individuals who have been touched by trauma, abuse or adversity. Please let me introduce myself. My name is Craig J. Phillips. I am a traumatic brain injury survivor and a masters level rehabilitation counselor. I am also an internationally published author and a motivational speaker with a message of encouragement, motivation, empowerment, inspiration and hope.

In August of 1967, at the age of 10, I sustained an open skull fracture with right frontal lobe damage and a severe brain contusion, brain stem involvement and a fractured left femur. I remained in a coma for 3 weeks. Although I was not expected to live the night of the car accident in 1967, or succeed beyond high school academically I went onto obtain both my undergraduate and graduate degrees. For more information see my About Page and my Professional Page.

On February 6, 2007 I created Second Chance to Live to share the principles and strategies that have encouraged, motivated, empowered, inspired and given me hope to succeed beyond all reasonable expectations. You may read what several individuals have said about the influence that Second Chance to Live has had upon their lives on my Testimonial / Endorsement Page.

To date I have written 503 articles for Second Chance to Live. These articles are listed with in my Site Map. Second Chance to Live has been published internationally. See my Publications page. I am available to be of service to you, your mission and your vision. Please see my Speaker Page and my Media Page.

I look forward to being of service to you and to individuals whose lives have been impacted by abuse, trauma or adversity.

Craig J. Phillips MRC, BA
Second Chance to Live

Our circumstances are not meant to keep us down, but to build us up!

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Acquired Brain Injury — In Pursuit of Self-Esteem Part 3 of 3

Please read Part 1 and Part 2 for context. Thank you.

I slowly began to realize that I needed to be for myself, but not against my fellows. I began to realize that I did not have to see my circumstances and experiences in extremes, but rather as part of my learning process. I began to realize that I could incorporate learning curves to all my learning. I began to realize that I could set my own rate and pace for learning.

I began to realize that I did not have to see my discomfort and pain as negatives, but rather as catalysts for positive change. I began to realize that I did not have to place judgements on my efforts. I began to realize that I could substitute my black and white thinking with shades of gray. I began to realize that I could substitute my all or none thinking with the concept of opportunities and possibilities. I began to realize that I could accept myself and my reality.

I began to realize that I could live and think outside of the box that I had willingly allowed other people to define for me.

I began to realize that I no longer needed to depend on the opinions of other people to validate or define my self-esteem. I began to realize that I could begin to be my own cheerleader. I began to realize that I could begin to define my own self-worth, self-value and self-esteem. I began to realize that I could begin to dance to my own drum. I began to realize that I could begin to freely express myself. I began to realize that I could begin to trust the process, a loving God and myself.

I began to realize that I could begin to have a relationship with myself.

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Acquired Brain Injury — In Pursuit of Self-Esteem Part 2 of 3

Please read Part 1 and Part 3 for context. Thank you.

With my awareness I slowly began to realize that I no longer needed to set myself up to have low-self esteem — by looking to other people to validate my worth and value. I slowly began to realize that I could learn how to detach myself from what other people thought of me. I slowly began to realize that I did not have to base my self-esteem and my self-worth on what other people thought of me.

I slowly began to realize that my self-esteem and self-worth were never meant to come from outside of me. I slowly began to realize the message brought forth in the following quote — “No one can make you feel inferior with out your consent.” Eleanor Roosevelt

Through my awareness I slowly began to realize that I no longer had to give my self-worth and self-esteem away. I slowly began to realize that I could change my motivations. I could stop looking to people for approval. I could stop seeking to justify myself through the eyes of other people. I could learn how to express myself with out first needing to seek the approval of other people. In my awareness I discovered that I could let people believe what they wanted to believe while practicing live and let live.

With my process, I slowly began to realize that I did not have to answer, defend, explain or justify myself to have self-esteem. I slowly began to realize that to build my self-esteem I needed to be aware of my motivations. I slowly began to realize that I needed to stop practicing self-defeating behaviors — such as people pleasing and approval seeking. I slowly began to realize that I needed to be aware of the triggers that drove me to do more in an attempt to be enough.

Please read the conclusion in Part 3. Thank you.

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Acquired Brain Injury — In Pursuit of Self-Esteem Part 1

Hello and welcome back to Second Chance to Live. I am happy to see that you decided to stop by to visit with me. In the past several days I have been thinking about the topic of self-esteem. Last night I attended a meeting and the topic of self-esteem was tabled for discussion. As I listened, reflected and thought about my own experience I realized that several key components had played a significant role in my pursuit of self-esteem. Performance and relationships.

My drive to be accepted by people to define my worth and value as a person dominated my behavior for many years. In the process, I discarded parts of myself in an attempt to be OK with other people and myself. In actuality, I was driven by the notion that I needed to make you OK with me, so that I knew you and I were OK , before I could hope to be ok with myself. This behavior manifested itself in all my relationships and in the process undermined my ability to be at peace with myself.

In the process I traded my opinion for the opinion of the people. The consequence of such behavior left me in a spiritual and emotional disarray. In the process I traded serenity for the hope of creating peace between other people and myself so that I could have peace with myself.

Through my process I began to realize that I had become dependent upon the moods of other people. In my dependence I strove through performance to “fix” other people in an attempt to garnish self-esteem. As a traumatic brain injury survivor with an invisible disability I became a convenient scapegoat for other people’s irritability and discontent. Consequently, in my attempt to compensate for my invisible deficits and limitation as well as my low or non existent-self-esteem I strove all the more in an attempt to achieve my self-esteem.

Through my process I discovered that by attempting to garnish my self-esteem from other people I set myself up to have low self-esteem and self-worth. I discovered that I had willingly given my self-esteem and self-worth into the hands of people over which I could not control and over which I could not “fix”.

Please read Part 2 and Part 3 for context. Thank you.

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Second Chance to Live — Special Edition — 500th Article

Hello and welcome back to Second Chance to Live my friend. I am happy to see that you decided to stop by to visit with me. As you may know I created Second Chance to Live on February 6, 2007 at the encouragement of a friend. During the past 34 months I have shared my experience, strength and hope with you. Your on going friendship and interest in Second Chance to Live has been a tremendous blessing to me. I am and I have been honored by your time and kindness.

As I have reached out to you, you have reached back to me through your comments and questions. By doing so you have been a part of my journey and my process. Thank you. Because you have been a significant part of my process and my journey — during the past 34 months — I wanted to share a significant milestone with you. With this article I am celebrating the 500th article that I have written for Second Chance to Live. The journey has been wonderful.

I look forward to the opportunity of writing another 500 articles. I also look forward to continuing to hear from you. Please let me know if you would like me to write an article about a specific topic. In addition, if you would like me to come to speak at a location near where you live please let your group, organization, association or corporation know of my availability. I look forward to being of service. In conclusion, I would again like to thank you for you friendship and for making Second Chance to Live part of your life.

Have a simply phenomenal day.

Craig

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Traumatic Brain Injury — I began to heal when… Epiloque

Please read Part 1, Part 2, Part 3 , Part 4 and Part 5 for context. Thank you.

Through out this 5 part series I have shared what helped me begin to heal. I began to heal because of my pain, anguish and my search for answers and solutions. In the following articles I elaborate on how I found answers and solutions. For more information into what helped me to begin to heal I would encourage you to read though the following articles.

As you read through the articles, if you have questions please feel free to ask. I will do my best to answer your questions. Below are the links to the articles.

What is Keeping you Stuck?, Whose Shame are you Carrying?, Displaced Sadness, Whose Life are you Living?, Who am I?, Traumatic Brain Injury and the Missing Pieces and Traumatic Brain Injury and the Pinball Machine.

In my search for answers I slowly began to realize that I had been denying my reality. I began to understand that I had been buying into various denial systems — both mine and what other people had for me. I speak to this awareness in my 4 part series My Struggle Living with and Invisible Disability and my 2 Part series Having an Invisible Disability — The Consequence of Denying my Reality.

Through my awareness I began to realize my opportunities. On the Road to Healing, Brain Injury, Self-Esteem, Self-Respect and Significance, Traumatic Brain Injury — Following your bliss…regardless, Small Successes, The Power of Identification,The Measure of a Champion , Traumatic Brain Injury and Not Judging Our Efforts, and In Pursuit of Destiny.

Please let me know if the above articles have been helpful to you. Thank you.

In Part 3 of this series I mentioned that there were 2 books that helped me to begin to heal. I stated in Part 3 that I would give you the titles of these books. Here are the titles and authors to those books.

Shame and Guilt — Master’s of Disquise Jane Middleton- Moz

Drama of the Gifted Child Alice Miller

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Traumatic Brain Injury — I began to heal when… Part 5

Please read Part 1, Part 2, Part 3 , Part 4 and the Epilogue for context. Thank you.

Through my awareness I began to heal when I began to realize that God — as a loving father — was using my circumstances and my experiences to direct me to the destiny — for which I had been created. I began to heal when I stopped placing judgements on what occurred in my life. I began to heal when I changed the way in which I framed and experienced my lessons — as part of my empowering process, instead of as a way to point out where I was not “measuring” up.

I began to heal when I stopped “shoulding” on myself and my life.

I began to heal when I started to realize that what I learned through my process was more important than arriving at any destination. I began to heal when I took responsibility for how I choose to react to individuals, groups, organizations, churches and religious institutions. I began to heal when I started to realize that no one can make me feel inferior with out my consent. I began to heal when I started to practice the principle of live and let live.

I began to heal when I stopped buying into other peoples denial systems. I began to heal when I started to accept my reality. I began to heal when I stopped buying into other people’s value systems. I began to heal when I started celebrating my small successes.

I began to heal as I realized that I needed to practice detachment — emotionally, physically and spiritually — from situations that I proved to not be good for me. I began to heal when I stopped believing that I should have already mastered everything. I began to heal when I started believing that with all learning therein involves a learning curve. I began to heal when I realized that I could use my gifts, talents and abilities in ways that work for me.

I began to heal when I realized that ALL my circumstances occurred in my life to teach me lessons, to prepare me for opportunities, to point me in the direction of my destiny. I began to heal when I realized that I no longer had to have the big picture. I began to heal when I started to trust the process, a loving God and myself.

Please read the Epilogue of this series for context. Thank you.

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