Is the Group that You are In Hurting You? — Are you being Bullied? Part 3
Posted by Second Chance to Live on April 29, 2013
In my experience, I found the below to be true. I had no idea that I had been bullied in previous groups – through control and manipulation – with the threat of being abandoned, ostracized, ridiculed, rejected and alienated. Because I was unaware and did not know any different, I allowed myself to be abused by the repercussions of “compliant conditioning” (my term). That is why I explain what I discovered in Part 1 and Part 2 of this article. That is why I would encourage you to read Part 1 and Part 2 of the article my friend, in addition to reading Part 3 of this article.
If you have not already read Part 1 and Part 2 of this article, please read Part 1 and Part 2 of the article, as both of these parts relate to Part 3 of this article. Thank you. You may read Part 1 and Part 2 of this article by clicking on the following links:
And now for Part 3 of the article
Some Additional Insights
More over, when individuals seek to integrate socially, similar contingencies – compliant conditioning — can be seen deployed. If the individual does not comply with the group’s covert or overt expectations, the previously set trigger is tripped. The individual — again — is led to believe that they must discard parts of themselves, in order to embrace what is expected of them. In the event that such expectations are used to control and manipulate the individual — with the threat of being ostracized, rejected, abandoned, or alienated — red flags appear.
The red flags need to be taken note of, if and when leaders or members of the group begin placing increasing expectations on you with repercussions — if you do not comply with their expectations. If you notice this dynamic occurring, with increasing frequency; the leaders and members of the group may not be good for you.
In my experience, I had to become aware of these dynamics before I could begin to separate myself from the emotional and spiritual impact of such dynamics. In my experience, I had to separate myself from these group dynamics before I could begin to learn to love and accept myself – as an individual. In my experience, I had to separate myself from such group dynamics before I could begin to see myself as valuable — as an individual. In my experience, I had to separate myself from these group dynamics before I could begin to use my gifts, talents and abilities in ways that work for me.
In my experience, I had to recognize when I was being shamed into “doing” by such group dynamics – subtly as it may have been — before I could begin to learn how stop “doing” and start “being” as an individual.
In my experience, I have come to recognize that groups who use compliant conditioning to control and manipulate their members are not good for me. I have come to realize that these groups are not healthy for me. In my experience, I have come to realize that by physically detaching myself from these groups, I take care of myself. I do not place any judgment on the leaders or members of these groups, as judging benefits no one. Instead, I have come to realize that by practicing the principle of live and let live, I am able to keep the focus on myself and go about my business.
By keeping the focus on myself, I am able to attend to my business, as I feel led to by a loving God. By keeping the focus on myself, I am able to use my gifts, talent and abilities in ways that work for me. By keeping the focus on myself and attending to my own business, I am able to stay centered. By keeping the focus on my own business, I am able to stay committed to my mission and vision as an individual.
You may send your question or comment to me by clicking on this link: Contact Page I would love to hear from you.
Receive more articles like this one simply by clicking on Subscribe to Second Chance to Live by email.
Subscribe to Second Chance to Live, Bookmark and Share Second Chance to Live with your friends through a Feed Reader
All material presented on Second Chance to Live is copyright and cannot be, copied, reproduced, or distributed in any way without the express, written consent of Craig J. Phillips, MRC, BA Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs CC BY-NC-ND
This entry was posted on April 29, 2013 at 8:12 pm and is filed under acquired brain injury and feeling alienated, adult children of alcoholics and traumatic brain injuries, Adult Children of Alcoholics living with traumatic / acquired brain injuries, Awareness Acceptance Action, Brain Injury Education, Caregivers for people with traumatic / acquired brain injuries, celebrities with brain injuries, Empowerment and Inspirational Speaker, Empowerment Speaker, Families impacted by brain injuries, Finding practical hope as a tbi survivor, finding your bliss, Finding Your Significance, Fulfilling your Destiny, Harnish Your Adveristy, How to Make Peace with God, learning disabilities, Learning to Accept Yourself as a brain injury survivor, Learning to Love Yourself as a brain injury survior, Life, life challenging experiences, living my destiny, living with a brain injury, Living with a Disability, Living with a disability and overcoming being bullied, Living with a Invisible Disability and feeling shame, living with a traumatic / acquired brain injury, Living with a traumatic brain injury and feeling shame, Living with an Invisible Disability, living with meaning and purpose, Meaning and Purpose, messages of hope, messages of hope and inspiration, Mild Traumatic Brain Injury, Military Personell impacted by Traumatic Brain Injuries, Military Traumatic Brain Injury Support Meetings, Motivational / Inspirational Speaker, No Longer a Victim, Overcoming a Fear of Failure, Overcoming being Bullied, Overcoming Societal Stigmatization, Parents of children living with a brain injury, Parents of children with Acquired brain injuries, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and Suicide, Revealing your Destiny, Soldiers and Marines who sustained traumatic brain injuries, spinal cord injury, stroke, Suicide and Hope, tbi adults, tbi children, tbi families, tbi veterans, Traumatic Brain Injury and being Bullied, Traumatic Brain Injury and Comfort, traumatic brain injury and frustration, Traumatic Brain Injury and Hope, Traumatic Brain Injury and Learning, Traumatic Brain Injury and Significance, Traumatic Brain Injury and Suicide, Traumatic Brain Injury and What is my Destiny?, Traumatic Brain Injury and You, traumatic brain injury feeling alienated isolated, traumatic brain Injury in adults, Traumatic Brain Injury in children, traumatic brain injury in schools, traumatic brain injury Iraq, Traumatic Brain Injury Motivational Speaker, Traumatic Brain Injury Research and Resources, Traumatic Brain Injury Self-Esteem and Self-Worth, Traumatic Brain Injury Support Groups / Meetings, traumatic brain injury treatment, Veterans Living with Brain Injuries, What is my Destiny?. Tagged: Are you Being Bullied?, Control and Manipulation in Groups, Finding Yourself, How to Recognize Unhealthy Groups, Peer Pressure and Bullying, Signs of an Unhealthy Social Group Control through Intimidation and Manipulation, Subtle Bullying, Toxic Group Dynamics. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.